New Ventures

Ok, so I was thinking how life comes in stages. The metephore that occurred to me was that of an actor. Have you ever watched a movie or tv show and had that odd feeling when you see an actor? You know you've seen them in something else but can't quite put your finger on it? Your wheels start to spin and the movie or tv show is progressing on the screen but you can't focus because you're now fixated on 'placing' the face. Or...you know exactly where you've seen the actor before and you have a difficult time believing the new character because the actor's past role is so deeply ingrained in your mind (type casting). That happened to me, for the first time, with Michael Landon. I was familiar with Little House On The Prairie's "Pa" before I ever saw a rerun of Bonanza.

It was weird to see "Pa" as the hot-headed youngest son of a ranch mogul. It took me a while to adjust, especially when on Wednesday nights, Little Joe Cartwright was all grown up with a family of his own about 100 years in the future.

Back to the metaphore - I can review each of the life stages I have experienced and describe, with clarity, the role I played. I've heard interviews with actor's that recall the 'good ole days' on the set of such-and-such a show. They speak fondly of the co-stars with whom they worked, the challenges, the highs and lows of the series/movie shoot. You can sense that far away quality in their memories. Sometimes, that is how I feel about my life. Each stage represents a clear role I played and while I was most definately "me", I feel estranged to the person I was during that time. It is the estrangement caused by time, growth and distance from others who accompanied you during that particular stage.

With this in mind, I pick my way through a slightly overgrown path to a new adventure that will offer me a more self satisfying end. I seek that which will allow me to make a new difference in this world and give me great satisfaction in the process. I aim to open a dog psychology and fitness center. I know... it's a dream, but I will do what I can to pursue it to my utmost. With kids nearly all gone (no rush, Sharayah!), I turn my attentions to a new adventure that, although not as critically important as raising productive self-reliant children, will fulfill me in the next stage of my life. Working with animals may seem frivolous to some, but it is a passion and knowing I can help a dog and the humans committed to caring for it gives me an outlet for that passion. Tonight, I instructed a man in training his dog to the 'down' command. To see them click. Get "it". Work together in harmony. Understand each other without words... I had to smile. It was the only option.

In regards to the role I will play after this one?.... Perhaps I could participate in a spin-off entitled, "Grumpy Old Women"? Or...(if Bryan titled it), "Edna's Day In The City"